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Adventures!!

Friday, December 1, 2023

Movie Review: The Love Witch (2016)

The Love Witch
Anna Biller, 2016


Ah, love... those awkward moments when you really like a person and you try to get their attention. Some flirt by touch, others by words. Some by acting like a complete fucking idiot. A lot of the time, the weird rituals us humans have to attract another tend to work at some degree... unless you're an obvious tool who gets their pickup lines from a banana flavored Laffy Taffy wrapper. But, alas, regardless of our rituals of flexing our average sized muscles, winking with fan sized eyelashes, or throwing up on accident from nerves, not everyone's cut out for relationships. So, what's a lonely soul to do? 

Create a love spell of course, seduce every man you contact, accidentally murder them and then move on to the next... like some kind of black widow or something. Or, better yet, a Love Witch. 

Naturally, of course... what? Doesn't everyone do the same?




Friday, July 22, 2022

Movie Review: Satanic Panic

Satanic Panic
Chealsea Stardust, 2019

Ah yes, the age old fear of the Devil. Satanic Panic was a trend among many folk, even non-religious people, who had a fear of heavy metal, questioning authority, and Dungeons and Dragons... for some reason... The panic went well into the 80's, making it hard for anyone who was a little bit against the grain to exist in peace and quiet. One of my favorite videos online relating to this panicked moment in time-- although it's more witch-adjacent rather than strictly demonic/satanic-- is the video where a pastor is talking about how Pokemon is evil because of energy balls and lightning bolts. I guess this falls into the same category cause everything comes down to the Devil. You smell a little funny? Devil. You enjoy music a little too loud? DEVIL! I'll link it here: Pokemon is Evil (this is a legitimate sermon, by the way!)

There's plenty of resources that goes into way more depth about the historical Satanic Panic. Here are some sources here: 

Satanic Panic & The Dangers of Cultural Hysteria
What Was the Satanic Panic & Why Did it Happen? |A History Series
How Satanic Panic Came to Roil the Nation During the 1980s

These links, and hilariously dumb video on the evils of Pokemon, all can help get you into the idea of the fear behind Satanic Panic. How does this all relate to the movie Satanic Panic? Well, let's review it and see!


Monday, July 18, 2022

Movie Review: Phenomena


PHENOMENA

Dario Argento, 1985


Do you like insects and wish to control them? Do you also like murder mysteries? Well, have I got the movie for you. With a sporadic story telling style and some odd yet killer music choices, Phenomena is a wild movie that makes you almost want to be able to control creepy crawlies and make them do your bidding. Or maybe not. Let's get into it!


Sunday, May 30, 2021

Movie Review: Out of Time

 Out of Time

By Matt Hardy
2019/2021


Well, finally I shout to myself, we are finally getting into reviews. It's been a while since I used to review things here and there-- in fact, it's been a while since I've posted or even had the energy to enjoy things that I truly love when 6 years in college have ripped every ounce of happiness from my head. Funny how that works: You put so much effort into getting a career that you toss away everything you love. One of the things that I love, is watching movies. Well, and also reviewing them. It's been a time since I've had the energy and prowess to even do so, seeing as it's hard to get thoughts out about movies that I've watched thousands of times. 

Introduction: So, today, I bring you one I just viewed as of two nights ago on the streaming service bestowed upon us by our cooperate overlord: Amazon Prime. This movie, as you can see by this post's title, is called: Out of Time and I believe it was filmed in 2019, but according to Amazon it was created in 2021. I'm not sure which date is correct, but if the Overlord says 2021, we'll go with that. I found this as I scrolled to find more sci-fi and horror films of a lower caliber of quality, trying to find something that would hold my interest for more than a second-- attention spans are small, you see-- and, there it sat with a very interesting premise. So, let's get into it!





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